The Deed and other ramblings...

Yep, it's done.

One of the most note worthy things you may notice about this blog is that I will take no prisoners and I will most likely overshare to my hearts content. Just an F.Y.I. so you can leave now and never return if that's not what you are in for.

So, onward to too much information!

....

Ash and I did the sexy times, it was brutal and overly painful, but it's done. I am glad to have done it for his sake, as he was frothing at the mouth due to no sex for two months at that point. It took alot of lube and a little tylen.ol after but it wasn't the tramatic experience I had thunk up in my mind. My ladybits were beaten already, right? I wouldn't say it was the most pain I had endured, no where near childbirth...but it that was a 10 on the pain scale, this was a 5.

Speaking of ladybits. My six week checkup was upon us yesterday. The nurse that I adore has left the practice and I was left with this "mama doesn't know best" bosy version of her. It was not pretty. She reminded me how to lay on the table for a pap smear, like I hadn't been laying on one every damn day it seemed during my pregnancy. I was able to talk with dr. McHippy about the pain I had been experiencing...I left out the sex part, whoops, didn't know that wasn't okay'd yet. What I thought was a bad vericose vein from pushing was actually unhealed scar tissue from my tear which makes me wonder just how big that tear was, considering the pain of the "scar tissue" is nearly front to back. There is absolutely nothing that can be done for it, being allergic to good pain meds is awesome, so I get to suffer for another 6 weeks to 4 months while my ladyparts go back to normal. Yay! for more painful sex! Also found out that one of the stitches was still present...aka no sexy times allowed for another week or two.

I still owe a breastfeeding explanaion post and a bodymorphing post for those of you I know want one...I promise to get to it soon. We are having major computer issues but those should soon be fixed.

Today is my birthday, so far I've broken all of my rules about taking care of yourself first and no chores. Damn, being a mom on your birthday stinks. I've fed Madelyn breakfast in bed and had to do the dishes/trash/laundry morning routine already and it's not even 8am. The closest fun times ahead today are a trip to Targ.et. Ash had to work his first day shift, so it's just me and the little lady all day. Diapers! Drool! Spitup! Poop....all types of Poop! ahead...

A little help required....

I am a defunct color picking momma.

With the paint colors up on the wall, I need to get these wall stickers ordered asap to start being able to fully put the room together. The wall colors are bright, as in a blue/aqua and orange chair rail shown in the picture below. The fabric for the crib quilt and maybe a pillow or two is in primary colors and is ridiculously hard to locate but I think I found a source. As you can see, there are alot of colors to work with. But mainly....I need help deciding on the wall graphic colors.

The large giraffe/turtle graphic I am leaning towards a primary blue color and lime green (kinda like shown). We are also going to have a lion (primary red?), grass (lime?) and a sign pointing to the jungle (yellow?) that both will be on top of the blue/aqua color. I could also introduce a brown if necessary as the furniture is espresso (and the only thing brown in the room at the moment)....

We did just order the crib, after changing from the original option (didn't convert into a full size). The bedding will most likely be all white minky dot material with the only pattern on the blanket itself.

So....what do you all think?

Sibling jealously

Baby was born last night. I am officially an aunt and officially jealous of my brother. I didn't really get jealous of the pregnancy, just the aftermath of being able to hold a baby in your arms and know that they are yours to raise and love.

I feel badly for my dad, he's officially is a grandpa for the first time but my brother has sided with my mom and they aren't speaking. He didn't even get a email, text, or a phone call. I forwarded the information as I received it including pictures. I tried to broach the subject with my brother and my mom but just got dead response. I kniw that they should be able to feel what they feel, but this is an important milestone and one that should mend fences, not make taller ones. It makes me feel like when it's my turn that I should return the favor, but I'm not like that and unfortunately the only thing I can do is try to involve my dad as much as possible when it's us having the baby so he can really enjoy being a grandpa.

But, I can't wait to meet my newest family member, all said and done.

-- Post From My iPhone

A long day

Gonna post about groceries tomorrow, but just to update everyone as to my last few days, here's the review...

Baby tempie visited Friday, Ash was awake and was able to really able to see her for a bit. She got a bath in our sink and spent some time being a fussy 17 day old baby. Ash spent most of the visit holding her and was at ease doing it... I was jealous, I wanted to hold her too!

I had a doctor's appt, my first one where the focus was fertility. I wanted to find a doctor in my area that I could potentialy see through pregnancy and beyond. I think I found him. He walks in with sheets on fertility for me to have and was very honest and non judging about how long we'd been trying. Realistically, if we get to the year point then we'll start the testing, but for now he wants me to focus on eating healthy (and more) and gain a little weight as he thinks my body mass is low...21 and he'd liked to it be a little higher. He also asked if after he was successful in helping us conceive if we had an on and family doctor in mind, after I told him I'd love to stick with him, he said he was pleased, as he loves being part of the making of a baby and then be able to watch the baby grow. Swoon.

Omg. I hate the new generation of teens. They ransacked my store and started a fist fight, started a fire in the parking lot of another store, and broke glass and graffitied at yet another one. (sounds like a full on riot, but really just a couple thousand kids loitering at a mall for too long) All during some skate festival outside in the mall parking lot. My store is the the store people used to get dressed up to come to, today they walked thru it without shirts on and cursing. I got to be on escalator police duty today, it was really super fun and all day I went from being polite about it at 11am to nearly cursing back by 7pm. When did an escalator become a toy? Seriously.


-- Post From My iPhone

In a perfect world...

We'd be getting head deep into painting this room, taking all of the ideas we've had and implementing them for all the world to see. This perfect world being the one where we were pregnant the first month we started trying. Who knew this was not a perfect world....

Anyhow, this is what the plan for the nursery is currently....and since I've newly discovered the collage feature on Picasa, I thought I would show you all what could be, if only....

Not too bad...

The baby shower really wasn't a super experience, but it also wasn't awful. My step mom was ogling after one of my cousins who is glowing with pregnancy (not the one the shower was for) and I can tell you that was the most painful part...watching her wishing to be a grandma. The baby shower was good, my other cousin didn't know she was pregnant until she was about 5 months along so there wasn't much prep time in ways of finances and planning for the upcoming babe. Everyone really put forth an effort to make sure she would have what she needed to start her new family.

I forgot my camera, which I always do it seems. I had found a great picture from Making it Lovely, where her sister had made decorations using a clothesline, pins, and outfits. Our version turned out well, less handmade items and more cute onesies, but I loved it. My cupcakes were a hit, I was worried but they turned out! Hopefully someone took pictures so I can post them here.

Still the same

Another negative today. Sweet Jesus this is killing me.

I've had some cramping yesterday and today, so my period is probably right on track for Saturday. Funny that before I started jotting down any and all things going on with my body that the only "sign" I thought I had of a period coming was severe cramps two to three hours before I started. I now know that I have a good variety of PMS and other symptoms up to a week before my period!

I still cling onto the last bits of hope for this month.. the ovulation ticker at the bottom of this blog suggests that a negative test could just be a too early test on today's date. I really hope this is the answer. I'm officially out of tests, and with only two days to go, I don't know whether to buckle down and get some of the good tests, or just swing by the dollar store tomorrow and pick up some more cheapies.

Even Ash is slightly irritated at this whole process, he says it's just frustrating to keep getting negatives... as least he isn't thinking about it 24 hours a day all month like good ol' crazy here.

I was talking with my brother (see previous posts) Adam and he made me feel a little more normal for thinking about strangling the next person to tell me "just stop trying, it will happen when you stop thinking about it." I'm glad violence runs in our family when it comes to that statement! Try and stop thinking about....what you are eating, drinking, feeling...just stop seeing all of those teenage moms wander thru macys on their way to the food court with newborn infants in umbrella strollers, screaming their heads off, and their mom shaking the stroller to get them to stop...instead of supporting their child's bouncing head and look around...do you see a bottle or a diaper bag, NO... because clearly these people can procreate and make AMAZING parents. Sorry, that rant is coming from an internal desire to slap someone for telling me to not think about it... people who make good parents worry about things related to the making and raising of a child.

Surprise! Announcements Cont...

Another Good Surprise Option:

Easter Coming Up? Bring your parents an easter basket as a gift to celebrate the holiday. Amidst the candies (I suggest Cadbury Bunny Eggs, the absolute best indulgence on earth) place a few plastic eggs with hidden messages inside instead of candy... Write messages for each one - "Nope, not this one!" "Try Again" "Almost there"... and finally "We're Pregnant!"

Nada yet...

Took a First Response Test, didn't even get a registered line for the not pregnant part, so I have to retest in an hour or so. This is bullshit. I've heard bad things about the first response, but as you know from previous posts, I was unsure at Target what to buy.

My boobs are so incredibly sore, it's crazy. And they gotten heavier. And they've dropped a bit.

I hope this will all work out! I wanna know NOW!

Handmade Things

On this kick to discover how to make baby a less expensive endeavor in this hard economic time, I've turned to the internet to revive my crafty skills and find some inexpensive things I can make to save some dough.

The best websites I've come across so far are:

Make Your Own Baby Stuff has baby slings (hell yeah I want one of those), baby toys, food recipes, baby shower gift ideas.... you name it. I only wish I had come up with this myself. I know I want to make some of their rattles as gifts for the showers I have to go to this month. I might take this a bit further, and if I do, I'll post pics of my major craftiness skills for all to see.

Etsy is a crafter's dream website. I have a shop there (no items currently, like I said I am trying to revive the skills) and it's one of the best places to window shop for new ideas or gift options for just about anyone.

Contined Surprises

In my never ending search for the perfect way to announce "we're pregnant" to the 'rents.... I am keeping a running tab of sorts on interesting ways to tell those you love.

And Your Fortune Is
Invite your parents over for a homemade dinner of chinese food, or takeout. Give them each a homemade fortune cookie at the end with "we're pregnant" inside. Or, if dining out, ask the restaurant to pass out these cookies at the end of your meal.

Here's a fortune cookie company that you can get customized messages included in...and at not too bad of a price.

Missed opps...

Shit. I was off a day and I think I may have ovulated early. This doesn't make things very "hey we're pregnant" things happen when you get off by a few days, but in the crazy possibility that it works anyway....I'll shut my mouth and hope for the best.

Disposable vs Cloth

When determining how expensive this little bundle of goodness is really going to be, an important thing to consider is the diaper dilemma.

From what I can gather (and please tell me to shut up and give me the right answer if any of this is incorrect) babies average 70-80 diapers per week the first month, with the numbers decreasing as the months go on. Not looking at the environmental aspects of cloth vs disposable, I have come up with a breakdown of it all.

Cloth diapers initial cost = $300 -500 dollars, very little additional cost...

Cloth diaper service per month = 82.00 in my local area = $2400 over three years.

Disposable Diapers = $3000 over three years.

I never thought I'd be that person to actually consider cloth diapers. Usually I get all "eeeeww" about poo, but it seems cloth diapers have come a long way....and the diaper service is not a bad option. They also have flushable liners now to get the "eeeeww" part out of the diaper washing. I don't think I will really know where I sit on this one until I give it some more thought.

Costs of a baby...

Trying to come up with a tried and true list of absolute needs when it comes to a new baby. I've heard a variety of things, like you don't really need a bouncer....or a highchair.....or a changing table.
But, alias, I am still considering these things only because I am a retail gal, dedicated to the best of everything and not wanting to forget something I've been brainwashed into thinking I need.

Here's the list so far.... please let me know if I am missing something or don't need a particular item.....and any advice you are willing to give thusfar.

Crib - Preferably one that converts to a toddler bed.
Changing table
Dresser
Bedding
Diaper Pail
Cradle
Playard - for downstairs
Carseat - with two bases for car
Stroller
Bathtub
Bottle Drying Rack
Baby Monitor

So what am I missing?

Continued... Surprise! Suggestions

Earlier, I started a post on how to announce a baby is coming to your loved ones...
hopefully over the coming posts, you'll find some of this tidbits helpful.

Big Family Gathering

Gather the family and let them in on the secret by giving them a shirt with the iron on saying "What are you looking at GRANDPA & GRANDMA" and you wearing a "Yep" it may take a minute, but eventually he'll get it!

Baseball Game

If you've got the funds, think about getting an announce up at a game. Either pay for the big "Hey dad, we're pregnant!" for the scoreboard, or bring your own sign and open it up for the cameras to catch (bringing you on the screen and he will suddenly see it's not "Go Mariners" you're holding).

"Hey I need your help with the car..."

Stop by your dad's and get him to help you with something in your car. Let him know you are trying to install a new gadget and it's just not working. Once you get out there, open the back seat and let him "see" the new gadget....a car seat.

Key Funding

Surprise your parents with a card "just because" and inside, place a gas gift card. Explain to them... you'll be needing this as we'll be needing you to come visit your new grandchild!

Surprise! How to tell the ones you love...

You're Pregnant. How do you tell everyone? The internet is filled with small, mediocre ways of surprising the hubby, the newly branded grandparents, and the other assortments of folks you may know and want privy to such information. Over the years, I've come up with some decent ways of announcing this wee bit of excitement...

Dads / Grandpas

Does he happen to work in Construction? Get him a new tool belt filled with all of the new tools he'll need...diapers, wipes, bottle, teether.

New Grandparents

Take pictures from a recent family gathering, holiday time, vacation, anything you can think of and go to MyPublisher or Snapfish and make a book... use the last page as a place to put an ultrasound picture or a "addition coming soon " page.

The Sudden Woes of I don't know....

I don't know if I can enjoy a coffee or a martini with friends... the worst part about the two week window is the sacrifice of caffeine and telling friends "no, but thanks." Shouldn't Evolution have come up with a way to tell a woman she's pregnant immediately so she doesn't ruin her unborn child's life.

And now we wait...

The damage is done and now's just the waiting period of "I wonders"

The Hunt Begins

If I wasn't thinking about babies constantly already, and wondering to myself, what the F^%& is wrong with me for not producing a duplicate in a more timely matter....

Being the oldest child, oldest grandchild, oldest cousin.... friend who got married first.... it was expected that I procreate as quick as humanly possible. Everyone is in constant reminder that we were not willing to conceive in the past due to finances, and now that we have finally decided to dive in and just do it, it seems that people have forgotten that it can take some god damn time.

There's only a twenty percent chance of making babe a month, even if we are totally on it and get to the baby making on schedule. I'm not interested in standing on my head, or checking my temperature every morning and running around on all the baby forums talking TTC and whatever other codes momwannabes make up.

When it happens it happens, just everyone else STOP producing so I can get a chance at the limelight.....when I'm good and ready.